As stated in a previous blog, I decided to make some temporary life changes. One of my many mottos is 'Go big or go home' and as luck would have it I made some big decisions all at once. All within the same weekend I decided to take a break from my best friend who I have known since middle school, give up ALL alcohol until Easter (making St. Patty's Day and exception to the rule. After all, it is my favorite recognized non gift giving holiday.) begin a hard-core job search and focus on myself and try to eliminate unnecessary stress and drama. And then someone died. Great. Icing on the cake right! Please don't think that I am being insincere because that's not how I want to come across but in the grand scheme of things that's how it happened. For real. Back to the motto for a moment, I like it best when referring to diamonds, drinks, paychecks, trust funds and some other things ;) just to name a few but not so much in the bad way like when giving things up or having to deal with life. In those situations it's just not the right motto because after it all you think why didn't I just go home aka give up and call it a day.
The first week of the "new me" was the hardest! As if trying to be a good friend to friends that lost a very close friend, paying my respects to the deceased, not talking to my best friend and not drinking weren't bad enough but it was also a week where my boss decided to be let's say hormonal, even though I think she's menopausal, both of which are nice ways of saying she was in major bitch mode. That was definitely a stressful week and one in which I questioned on more than one occasion (per day) why I had chosen to not drink. But guess what, I persevered! I got through it with the help of prescription drugs and Tylenol PM. What did you expect? I can't just give up everything! One step at a time.
That was just the beginning. There was also a week where I was an emotional wreck thanks to my frienemy Dot and my face exploded in ways that can only be described as asteroids trying to escape from under the skin only above my neck. Turns out it was because of a $95 face cream! For that much money I expect greatness like a glow or shimmer or something fabulous not to end up looking like I slept outside without a mosquito net! Ugh! So as my face begins to regain its moderate terrain and color I think, 'things are starting to look up' WRONG! On my way to church I rear-end an elderly lady who happens to be on her way to the hospital to visit her sick elderly husband. I made a common mistake by not paying good attention. I mistook a green turn signal for the green light and CRASH. Thankfully little damage was done to her car but unfortunately for me there was lots of obvious damage to P. Soph. Long story short: Body damage, mechanical damage, Spring Break=Insurance adjustors on vacay, no rental on my insurance policy. The new me has quickly become a younger more fashionable and sober Miss Daisy. Rock bottom? Not quite. Then Josie gets a free ride to the emergency room where she was hospitalized for a short period of time. Miss Daisy had it good compared to me! I then decided I was more like Job, you know, from the Bible. I had skin issues and everything that could possibly go wrong had gone wrong.
So here I am. It is Easter weekend! I am still car-less although I do enjoy not having to drive. I am proud of my soberness 68 days (minus 2, one was a Sunday and the other was a holiday) and proud of my no facebooking. I have applied for a random array of jobs all across the U.S. And, I can honestly say that I think that after everything that has happened over the last three months that I have more faith than I have ever had before. I'm trying everyday to be more positive and compassionate to those around me. I have chosen to have a new perspective in hopes that it will make me a better person.
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