2009: An Epic Year

Another year has flown by and the shenanigans of 2009 hands down beat the happenings of 2008! (see My Ode to 2008) If you’ve already read that and you’re thinking that’s impossible just remember, the possibilities are endless! So put on a diaper and get ready to roll on the floor...

I have found that the best way to remember things is through photographs because my memory is not great and often times it is fuzzy or altogether forgotten. This remembrance is a combination of my memories and the photos from the past year.

We all know how 2009 began...HUNGOVER! That’s a never a great start for a day much less an entire year but we pulled out just fine! (that was for you mb ;) lol) So after recovering from that we had a fun photo shoot and a mini pre-birthday warm up celebration one random night at The Kudu. That night we were on the bar,on the stage, behind the sound controls, head in trash cans and spinning in capes. The beginning of that sounds a rap song...just a little bit. :) Then there was my actual birthday festivities! I joined forces with MB for a celebration at Chuck E Cheese and it was fabulous! Great friends and lots of fun and the best peanut butter cake a girl could ask for. The celebration continued and was nothing less than fantastic. For birthdays, this was just the beginning and some would refer to theirs as the best birthday ever!

We celebrated Rebecca’s birthday in February, more fun times at The Kudu! Skip ahead to April-May-ish and lil Jac turned 21 and Buzz turned 30! Of course Jac had to be initiated into the world of The Kudu and she’s been a fruitloop lover ever since. Her birthday also fell around Crawfish weekend so we also enjoyed some LL Cool J, Katie Perry, Jason Mraz and some other fun musical guests and then jumped on a short bus only to continue the fun times and memory making. And for Buzz, what better way to celebrate than with a theme?! Golf Pros and Tennis Hos it was! And this is when the murf began! Lots of fun times, scandalous pictures and a little bit of beer glove action. Little did we know that this would be the last party we would ever have at Rebecca’s Southside home.

Next came Tiff and 2...Tiff has finally given in and let me tell her exactly how and for how long to celebrate her birthday. So this was her making up for bad birthdays birthday celebration and it lasted a long time! We first celebrated with a beach trip (see Girls’ Beach Trip 09: PCB) but unfortunately not everyone could make it. We had a blast at the beach and by that I mean by the pool 2 feet from a tiki bar. =P But because everyone could not make it to the beach we had a reason to celebrate more when we got home. Tiff had lots of surprises in store for her! She got everything she wanted and more. We all met and had dinner at Jacksons and then head to our favorite home away from home for some ColdStone cupcakes, drinks and oh yeah, a live band! Worth getting barefoot for, right?! Then to IHOP for some lingdon berries and the explanation of the brown towel. And a week later we all gathered again for Kimberly and A2’s joint tye dye themed birthday celebration. Let me just say, duh-runk! We began with pizza and lots of beer before heading to the Lakeview District for an unexpected bar CRAWL! We started at The Kudu and worked our way around the block to On Tap and then crawled our way back to The Kudu.

There were also other happenings between all of the birthday festivities. St. Patty’s day (one of my favorites btw) Memorial Day, bridal parties, wrecking a Hummer, beach trips, pool days, weekends at the lake and unfortunately an unforgettable Labor Day weekend. Trash the dress, a boy on a big green tractor, LSU/UA game, renewal of wedding vows, a new pool boy, motorboats, silent auctions and Martinis & Mistletoe. Fun times all year long and the best ending to a great year: A birthday party for Kerri and a NYE party. 2009 all year long was the best! I was surrounded by great friends and had a blast doing most of the things that I did. You know it’s a good year when your regrets are minimal, your pictures are good and plentiful and at the end of the day you still have people to call your friends.

Splenda vs. Sugar

I’m a sugar girl. A substitute is just that and I like the real thing. Sometimes you can’t get sugar even though that’s what you really want. So what other choice do you have but to have a little Splenda? You have to make due with what you’ve got; love the one you’re with right? In life you have to make choices. I’ll be the first to say that I’m not the best decision maker. Sometimes, scratch that, lots of times I make bad choices. Don’t get me wrong, good ones usually follow right behind the bad ones but it’s the bad ones that get me every time! My question is that in world full of Splenda and very little sugar should you hold out or just enjoy the Splenda?

love

Love. Love is many things. Love is multifaceted and can be uniquely defined by each individual experiencing or yearning this whirlwind of emotion and feeling. Those who know me, know that I have relationship issues. These issues are in conjunction with love but not to be confused with love or the idea of it. Today I realized how special love actually is.

I’ve always had a jaded sense of love. I guess because I over analyze things and there’s not a clear cut answer about love- not because I grew up with a lack of it or experienced it in a perverted way or anything like that. I have a lot of love in my life and sometimes I take it for granted. I can be a lot of things but nice sometimes most times, well, that’s all debatable but that’s not my point. Point being, that no matter my dislike and/or bratty attitude I still love those that I loathe. This got put in perspective for me today in a big way. Love isn’t perfect and though people fuss and fight it doesn’t mean that they don’t love one another.

I remember love at different stages in my life. When I was in high school I used love as an argument. I would ask my teacher to define love, being that this was a Religion class he could reference Biblically for days. I didn’t care to hear the answer. I used this as a ploy to buy me time to do other homework or study for tests that I had later in the day. I also manipulated the idea of love to get my way, “If you love me you’ll...” This worked on my parents and boyfriends for a long time (maybe that’s why I’m the brat that I am today.) I also remember working close to a cafeteria and every Sunday after church I would watch the little old men and women go to lunch. Observing these elderly couples was one of the sweetest things that I’ve ever witnessed. The men would walk around the car and open the passenger door, offer a hand getting in and out of the car and offer another hand when stepping on or off of the sidewalk, they opened doors and kissed the cheeks of their significant others. As I got older, I began to notice other patterns of love. The changing of relationships and love not being what you thought it would be and learning the difference between infatuation, lust and love...getting your heart broken and learning how to overcome that and try it again.

In a world where there are more broken homes than there are successful marriages, it is easy for love to be cheapened, forgotten and taken for granted. This is ironic to me because no matter how lost or hopeless, people still yearn to find and to experience love. My parents have been married a long time but my grandparents have been married even longer, almost 70 years! Today, at the hospital, the nurses were inquiring about how long my grandparents have been married. They commented on how they could tell how much my grandfather loved and cared for his wife. At that moment, I realized that my grandparents are those people that I used to watch every Sunday at work, my parents probably will be those people and one day, I want to be those people too. I am 26 and not married and that is because I am waiting for my person who I can be those people with one day.

And btw, this is why people fell in love with The Notebook! ;)

Hiatus Resulting From Randomness

Truly blessed, educated and single, yeah, sounds like a singles ad in a church bulletin but that’s me. After four years of college and achieving a BS degree, lots of job experience and having quite the social life (lol...so I’m told by some of my married friends), I have decided that I may be stuck in a rut. The economy is not good and doesn’t seem to be getting any better which raises my concern about having any kind of job stability.

Am I ready to begin a job search? Am I willing to move? If I move, there is still a chance of unemployment. Is it worth it? Should I go back to school? Am I smart enough? If I do go back to school should I still consider changing jobs? These are just some of the questions inside my head and that’s just concerning my professional future! Add in all of the questions and doubts about my personal life and you’ve got a ginormous mess! Not to mention that part of my head is still being used to function daily. Don’t be surprised if one day my head just implodes! Then I’ll need all kinds of surgeons, neuro and plastics especially. Well, that’s probably not even possible, so no worries there.

Anywho, I decided to go on hiatus to try to sort through some of the many thoughts ricochetting inside my head. So far so good...

A Week (or two!) Of Birthday Celebrations

As you may or may not know, I whole heart my girls and I whole heart birthdays and the celebrations that go with those girls’ birthdays! As it is, six of my girlfriends have birthdays within days of each other over a two week span. (Kimberly, 7/24; Tiffani, 7/30; Angela, Sara and Joanne, 8/7 and Megs, 8/9) A birthday celebration, on average, is approximately one week. Boiling it all down means not sober days outweigh the sober ones for those two weeks! So here is my blog on the happenings of those two weeks...

On Kimberly’s birthday, I was headed to my annual ‘girls’ beach trip’ which worked out because she wanted to have a double celebration with the other Angela. Tiffani began her birthday celebration on that beach trip. (The beach trip has its own blog!) The week that we got back from the beach was Tiff’s actual birthday week. She had plans with Brett and family so we decided to party hard that Saturday. I had to work but Tiff, Brett, Jac, Rebecca and Matt went to the lake that day and had fun in the sun.

That night we (Tiff, Brett, BA, Jay, MB, Kerri, Buzz, Rebecca, Matt, Sara, Jac, Keith Shoemaker, and myself) had dinner at Jackson’s. The weather outside was monsoon and inside the restaurant was like 500 degrees, no joke. After dinner and pressies we headed to the Kudu for Cold Stone cupcakes and more tasty libations. We lost some peeps but gained Greg Lee. After lots of beverages were consumed and we had completely cooled off from dinner and dried from the torrential downpour of rain, we were ready to get our party on! Many photos and funnies later we decided to go in and listen to the band. You know people are having a good time when they get barefoot in a bar! JS.

After a little drunk drama we decided it best to get Thanksgiving Dinner so we headed to IHOP. Tiff decided to have an inappropriate conversation with a server outside about whether or not he sold drugs and then announced abruptly in front of a cop how wasted she was. Nonfiction. Don’t forget Keith was with us so we were the loudest group of people everywhere went and at this time it was early in the a.m.! Talk of lingdonberries, intestinal issues and brown towels kept us rolling. And I’m pretty sure that everyone in IHOP thought that we were all too inebriated, loud and crazy and were probably wishing and hoping that we would leave! Several hours later, sun up, we were headed to the lake. Boats and beverages always make for a good time ;). Weekend 1 down!

The next week, my friend Jenny was in town from San Francisco so I met her for lunch one day and hung out with her and some peeps in Calera one night. Friday was Sara, Joanne and 2’s birthday. 2 had to work and we had planned to celebrate her and Kimberly’s birthday on Saturday and Sunday. Friday night, I met Sara, Joanne and some of their friends and significant others at the Garage for dinner and drinks. For me, no dinner and many drinks later, we decided to go to Rogue. After more drinks, shots and the closing of Rogue there was talk of going to The Nick :& Jonathan and I decided that we were going to fold on that note and go get something to eat.

I got home somewhere between 3-4 a.m. and had to be at work at 9:30. Work sucked that day! After work I met Tiff, Brett, MB, 2 and Kimberly for Kimberly and 2’s birthday celebration. Kimberly and 2 were late so by the time they got to Dave’s were several pitchers ahead of them. We had more beer and some pizza before heading to the Kudu for presents and cake. After an unfortunate sequence of events causing me to find the place of ‘funk and ill’ we did presents and cake and departed. We bar hopped around Lakeview until the wee hours of the morning. So, we started at Dave’s and from there went to the Kudu, Nana Funks, Innisfree and On Tap where we met up with Megs and several of her friends. From On Tap we went back to Innisfree, Nana’s and ended at the Kudu. We had at least one drink at every place that we went. By the end of the night my mood had improved and our hop had become more of a crawl! Back to where we started from-in all aspects... The next day off to the lake for more fun times, birthday brownies and a make out session with the sun. Birthday week 2: Complete.

Not everyone can do what we do. It’s survival of the fittest from July 24 until August 9 and we all survived! Every year gets harder because every year we seem to get older...so put your big girl panties on and start getting ready for next year!

Behind the Scenes:

*Falling out of cars

*Beer Gloves

*Projectile bodily fluids

*Drunk texts

*Lots of mini dramas

Matters of the Heart...

Can you lead your heart or does your heart lead you?

The other night at dinner, one of my friends was talking about how she and her husband are doing a Bible study at church and someone made the comment that you should not follow your heart but instead lead it.

In theory I think that this could work, but is it for everyone? When she was talking about it and that statement came out of her mouth, I couldn’t help but think, “Could this be true?”

Just recently I was telling another friend that I met someone that is everything that I could ever want but there’s just not that kind of attraction and chemistry that I seem to have for all of the wrong people. I think that if you can lead your heart then I would definitely lead mine towards this person and away from others. It just doesn’t seem to be working quite as well for me as it is for my friend. So why is that? Maybe your heart and your head have to be in sync? I just know that when my heart leads me my head is always saying No and when I try to lead my heart it says No. And sometimes good on paper is still not good enough!

Girls’ Beach Trip 09: PCB

Girls’ Beach Trip 09: PCB

Every year, for the past three years, my girlfriends and I have taken a girls’ beach trip. It’s an opportunity for us to get away and have some girl time. The boyfriends, husbands and lovers all get left at home to fend for themselves and eagerly await our return home. We are women of all kinds; some are married and others single, some are divorced and our ages span an entire decade but despite our differences we all come together once a year for our annual beach trip! This year, there were seven of us and we had a blast like always! Our beach trip was filled with fun times: surprises, presents, crack (LMAO), Jesus, some XXX school, relationship confirmation and a white dress!

It all began Thursday night as we drove down to the beach. The last week had been extraordinarily interesting for Tiffani because she had met a new man the Saturday before. Tiff was driving and MB, BA and I were passengers. We all had lots of questions and had plenty of time for discussion! Needless to say the drive down was very interesting and quite entertaining. And we almost ran over someone but that is a whole other story!

We were staying with Smiley Thursday night on Mulberry Lane and then hanging out until our condo was ready on Friday. When we got to Smiley and Scott’s, she had left us a note telling us to make ourselves at home. Since I had only seen their house in pictures I wanted to explore a little bit. I put my bags in the guest room and wondered around a bit. I got to the living room and just happened to look down and glance at their movie collection. Low and behold is a film titled Crack Addict 2 and there is a girl bent over touching her toes in nothing but a thong. Tiffani was outside and I thought that it would be hilarious to stand in front of the front door in the same position, fully clothed though. When she walked in she was like WTF are you doing?! And I laughed and pointed at the dvd case. We all had a little giggle but the next morning Smiley didn’t think it was as funny as we had thought it was because it meant that Mike had found it and watched it and done who knows what else to it! So who else lives on Mulberry Lane? The porn man! Oh, do you know the porn man, the porn man, the porn man Oh do you know the porn man who lives in Mulberry Lane? I think he’s distantly related to the muffin man who lives in Drury Lane. Talk about seven degrees of separation!

So the next day we got up and went to the grocery and then on to Pier Park to do a little shopping and get some lunch. Margaritaville couldn’t have been any better! From there we headed to the Sea Breeze Winery and picked up some gifts and some wine slush! Yummo!!! We got all checked in and unpacked. Once we were all settled in we realized that the Verizon commercials are nonfiction! The only people with any phone service were those that had “the network!” After slightly freaking out a bit we discovered that there was a small signal if you stood in just the right place out on the balcony. Btw, the view was AMAZING! We were on the corner so our balcony wrapped around and on one side was the beach and on the other was the beautifully landscaped pool. We also had to be in a special place in order to pickup a wireless signal. Since we were stealing it from someone it was a little spotty so we decided to go to the atrium to get a better connection. Tiffani stepped outside to have a ciggy and all of the sudden we hear screaming! One of Tiffani’s birthday surprises had arrived! Jac had pulled up and let her presence be known! She got settled in and we enjoyed pizza, beer and lots of gossip and judgment! Then Jac and I had a night beach shoot. So much fun! While we were out B decided to give free tutoring and visual demonstrations about all of the different girl on top guy on bottom sexual positions. (For those of you who don’t know B she has no modesty and has a very healthy sexual appetite and is very open about it.)

Saturday. Saturday morning some of the girls made appointment at the spa for a little massage. While at the spa those who wanted to sleep in did exactly that and then decided to get ready for the sun. In the midst of that a little Shrek came out and then we discovered the new and improved breakfast of champions: swiss rolls and beer!Unfortunately it was a little overcast so we set up camp at a prime location: right beside the tiki bar! The sun may have been absent but the libations were flowing freely. A few of us decided to go for a walk on the beach and after a mini photo shoot with a sailboat Jac dropped her camera and got sand in the lens ending our photo time. As we were walking I suddenly realized how not sober I had become as well as the fact that it was about 4 in the afternoon and I had forgotten to eat lunch, oops! Needless to say drunky pants was an understatement. I got lunch and decided I needed a nap. While I was napping there was still a lot of activity going on at the pool. Sadly I missed out on the following events but was very entertained when I heard the stories later that night. There was a change in bartenders and “Big Daddy” was the new sheriff in town. After getting off to a rocky start with the girls he warmed up and was giving free shots and drinks. Jac called out an ex and met a Jamaican. There was some flashing of the bartender and a couple of old men. Tiffani was trying to pimp out MB to a group of old men who wanted to suck her toes, when she said no to the toe-sucking they moved on to the next girl and were feeling her up when Tiff noticed and in her drunken state said, “Oh no! No! Well, you can touch but you can’t pen-a-pena-penetrate!!!!!” Enough said. And shortly after that they thought it best to come back inside. Good choice girls!

By this time, I was ready for round two and everyone else was drunk and hungry so we split up and half of us went to the Waffle House (because it was within walking distance) and the other half called in food to be picked up. At the Waffle House we made friends with the waitress-imagine that! who hooked B up with extra goodness on her waffle (no charge of course) and brought Tiffani some birthday pie. After Thanksgiving dinner Tiff’s new beau rang and they became facebook official. We waited outside while she was talking to him because she actually had service where we were, but we made the most of it as always. Pictures in trees are always fun! Not to mention all of the other fun props like doggie poop cans, benches and fire hydrants! After walking up 8 flights of stairs (we thought it would be sobering) the other had just gotten back and were eating their dinner which was packaged in styrofoam boxes. When they were finish the boxes went in the garbage can. Someone went into raccoon mode and dug out a dinner. The rationing of this was that it was in a box and it was kind of on top. And since it was in the box, “In the trash or on the counter, it don’t matter!” Lmao!!!

Sunday we were ready for a full on, all day make out session with the sun! He stood us up the day before so were determined we were gonna some today! And he brought it! =)

We were a little easier on the tiki bar drinks today than the day before but we were still set. Smiley and DBA left around lunchtime and then Jac followed later that afternoon. After a full day in the sun we were spent. But then we remembered our purpose! Sometimes in order to move into the future you have to let go of the past. Trash the dress! Can you think of a better way to move on? I didn’t think so! It was the perfect way to spend the last night of our beach trip!

The next day we got all packed up and had lots left over beer. You can’t let that go to waste so we filled the cooler and whatever was left we drank before we checked out.

We said our goodbyes to all of our newly made friends, Officer Mike, Melissa, and Conner. Then we were on our way.

10 Best of the Best Quotes from the Beach and One to Grow On...

I gotta man and his teeth are better than officer Mike’s

Who needs Wheaties when you have swiss rolls and beer?! It’s the new 2009 breakfast of champions!

8. In the trash or on the counter, it don’t matter!

7. She sho didn’t find Jesus but she did find Jack!

6. Watch out for the bush! Put your knees up!

5. Uh-uh. My shit travels.

4. OMG! It’s worse in the dark!

3. It’s better from the back

2. Dude! You’re not ruining my Kudu!

1. You can touch but you can’t pen-a-pena-penetrate!!!!!

*One to grow on...Shut up Angela and drink your beer!

(This one was in the car on the way home!)

The Best Convo

Preface: Before this conversation occurred we had had a 30 minute discussion about sex. Leading into the following conversation was a mild debate about whether or not there is a limit to someone telling you how pretty you are. One side argued that too much can be annoying and come off as being insincere while the opposing side said that they enjoy being told how pretty they look and that it should be limitless the times that they get told such things.

“Maybe when I get me some Jesus I’ll feel differently.”

“Please tell me that’s not what you really call IT.”

“No, I mean the real Jesus!”

And this concludes our 2009 Girls’ Beach Trip! 2010 is gonna have to step up its game to top this epic year! Nonfiction. So until next year...Peace out sisterfriends.

A Prom Birthday:Another Year Off Like A Prom Dress

Originally written January 4, 2007

PROM! How exciting! For those who don't know let me explain. My birthday is in 4 days and normally I have birthday week and a birthday trip. This year however, I cannot have a birthday trip because of work related circumstances and deadlines so my presence is mandatory. Instead I am having a themed birthday and the theme is Prom! Prom is going to be on January 10, 2007. Pre-Prom preparation (hair, nails, makeup, etc) will begin that morning and continue into the afternoon. Then my girlfriends and I will be putting on our formal gowns and heading out to dinner and drinks all over Birmingham!

Now, some of you might think that this is totally silly and random and that just means that you don't know me very well at all. I'm so excited and it's going to be tons of fun, in fact it will be way better than prom beacuse everyone is legally old enough to drink this time around =)

Age is just a number, it doesn't define who I am. Just because you get older doesn't mean you have to become old, so throw on your prom dresses and get ready for a good time!

Originally written January 11, 2007

We waited forever and it finally came...Prom! the biggest night of my whole year! So yesterday was prom and the girls and I began at 10 am and were "off like prom dresses." We started with nails and after our nails were done we were going to pick up some lunch. The other Angela had driven a separate car and was dilly dallying in her car in the parking lot. I decided to mess with her and throw myself on the back of her car like she had hit me. She started flipping out so I ran to the window laughing and she rolled it down and started yelling "Angela! Don't do that, you know I'm a bad driver and I thought I really hit you! And then I realized the car was in park and thought the car was malfunctioning!" It was hilarious!

Anyways, so we grabbed lunch and then we went to get out hair did. We then headed to get the make up done and decided to get fake eyelashes(they're the new thing, you know) Well, the makeup artists were not allowed to put the lashes on for us because of liability reasons, they tried to help us but there was an eyelash nazi who kept reprimanding them via headset for doing it for us so we had to help eachother. You have to put glue on the lashes and apply them on as close to your real lashes as you can and let them set for a few seconds before you open your eye. I did Angela's left eye first and it was great, then I did her right eye and thought that I had done a fabulous job so I went to purchase some products. The next thing I know, Rebecca comes running up telling me that Angela cannot open her eye because it's glued shut! OMG I glued her eye together! I felt so bad and she had tears running out of her eye. After it was all said and done it was funny and we totally laughed about it but I felt really bad. We finally got ourselves together and headed home to put on our dresses.

Once we were ready, we took tons of pictures! Real prom pictures, like on the stairs and in front of the fireplace, front, back, together, you name it we did it. Then I opened my birthday presents! I got some really cute stuff and couldn't have asked for anything better-Thanks Girls! And out the door we went to meet our dinner chaperones Flower and Stephen. They were waiting for us at the Olive Garden (because that's where people go for Prom). Dinner was good, lots of fun random conversation and then our bar hopping adventure began!

We started at the Blue Monkey, one of my favorite bars with one of the best bartenders in Birmingham, and had martinis. Then we headed to the north side of town and went to a new bar called Speak Easy that is owned by a friend of a friend. And onward to the Lakeview District we went. We arrived at the Barking Kudu and had birthday cake and FruitLoops! Jared came and then Barry and his posse and then Megan and Heather. There were even surprise bags with candy jewelry and big fun rings! We all wore our rings and candy jewelry and had tons of fun and took millions of pictures (hopefully they'll be up soon!) It was a fantabulous good time, even better than real prom! Best birthday EVER!

I Heart Us: A Beach Trip to Remember!

Originally written July 23, 2007

Sometimes a little girl time is just what you need. Some college friends and I planned a beach trip to Destin and had the time of our lives! We had drinky drinks, snacky snacks, nappy naps and smoky smokes all day everyday! It was just like college all over again, just for a little while.We made tons of new memories and took pictures so that we wouldn't forget! Here's a recap of some of our fun times and lessons learned:

Giddy up as Jiddy Up: Because sometimes a 'G' can make a 'J' sound!

And the Best Eater Award goes to...Jay Ellett presented by the Mohawk

2 trips to the ER: 1 for a Ltab seeker (lol) and 1 for an unidentified insect sting on the eyelid

It's not hard to chase firemen. You see the truck, U-Turn it and they'll lead you straight to their humble abode and take you to the other hotties!

A swamp filled with foam is no more fun than any other swamp

You can unintentionally become a sex kitten and all you need is a shaggy rug

You cannot exit The Wharf through the men's restroom, right Michelle? We don't call her Smiley for nothing!

Tiffani came along just for my entertainment! I dressed her up, spent her money, and made her a picture whore.

BA got addicted to Myspace aka Crackspace

Mushrooms and Ranch, not a good drunky drunk snack or a great combo to regurgitate

You can do everything at WalMart even research career opportunities! It's a long process and they offer great benefits however I was unable to complete my application.

Every girl needs a gihugic hat. It can come in handy when you're underdressed, they're fun to reshape, and they make cute pics.

It's impossible to find a key on the beach at 4am in the dark. Did I mention that the key was in my bra before I decided to flash you?

Oh, unforgettable fun times! I HEART US and am thankful for my girls, my sisters, my friends. But sadly we had to leave and once again go our seperate ways...at least until next time!

A WILD Weekend in Baton Rouge

Originally written November 12, 2007

Oh, my! Where to begin? Last week I received a phone call from my friend Kimberly inviting me and some friends down to Baton Rouge. Her boyfriend is the Pi Kappa Phi house dad and the plan was for us to stay in the frat house and tailgate for the LSU Homecoming game. We left Friday and began partying upon our arrival to the house.

Side Note: Tiffani, Rebecca and me---All single girls staying in a frat house Can we say trouble?!?!?!

Several drinks and introductions later I was a rice cooking baby mama who had been impregnated with twins by a tall dark and handsome Pi Kapp alumni. (hahaha, inside joke!) Tiffani passed out, I went MIA and Rebecca got caught in the act...(the act of what is not to be clarified at this time) and learned why they put locks on the door. We left the house with the Jasons to go to JBs house and returned a couple of hours later. Ben and JT then informed Rebecca and I that we were about to be the first people to ever do the walk of shame INTO the fraternity house. We walk in and Kimberly and Tiffani were concerned about our absence and expected a really good explanation. After some explaining we began drinking (it was game day and when in rome..) and then began to get ready. We partied all day and into the night and then we carashed and the next day woke up and drove home. We had a fun filled weekend with little sleep, lots of drinks, and tons of good times and new memories. Forgive me for the lack of detail, but some things I can't quite remember or they don't make sense because of the sequence that I remember them. But here are some random memories( not all are mine!):

"Ohhh! There some stuff going on in there! I saw it!" -Talley

21 Matt Dunn---Tea anyone? LMAO

"Don't talk to my baby mama like that, I impregnated her with twins!"

Are y'all twins? Which one are you? Were you the one...?

Me giving the bird to Ben and his boys during their gossip fest.

Charlie. =)

I have prizes for you!

Cutt Dogg...in my rice pot! hahaha

...And that’s what friends are for!

Originally written March 16, 2008

According to Merriam-Webster a friend is defined as:
1. One attached to another by affection or esteem
2. One that is not hostile
3. One that favors or promotes something
4. A favored companion
That’s great and I would agree with most of those, however I have my own defining characteristics and here I go...
I’ll begin with the one that I do not fully agree, number 2. Friends can be hostile people (it makes things more fun) as long as they are only hostile to you if and when it is absolutely necessary.

Friends always:
*Celebrate the good times
*Comfort you when going through bad times
*Help you get out of things you accidentally got into all by yourself
*Will be your alibi, no questions asked, but really lots of questions will be asked and you will be expected to answer ALL of them
*Make sure you have lipstick .. you go home with a doctor
*Tell you if you don’t look cute (because it makes them look bad if they’re with you and you look bad)
*Are willing to do things that sometimes they don’t want to do
*Want the best for you (even if they are jealous sometimes, and they will admit when they are jealous)

Friends never:
*Let you hook up with uglies
*Leave you stranded and/or lost
*Judge (at least not to your face)
*Let you drink alone
*Let you stay in one place long enough for your skin to grow on it! Yuck!!!
Okay so there are more things that friends do than things that they should never do and that last one was added in because of current events not because it has happened first hand, or second or even third.

Friends also do the walk of shame into fraternity houses with you and keep baseballs from hitting you in the face. They’ll go down with you drunk and into sticker bushes, laugh at you when you fall down but will always help you up and apologize for things said and done but not quite remembered.
Anyways, the whole point of all this is that friends can turn an unwanted date into a boy=+1 scenario. They can get you really drunk and make him really uncomfortable then lie to him and make him leave so that you can go back and chat up cute anesthesiologists...and that’s what friends are for!

"...I was laughing at myself being funny on drugs"

Originally written June 27, 2008

Shit happens. It happens when we least expect it and it will probably never cease. With age you learn to appreciate all of the shit because if not you're just going to be miserable. It's not really the shit that you appreciate, it's more the results of it and the silver linings. Oh, and the shit doesn't equate to funny unless your bitches are there to remind you of the aftermath. (I do realize that I am saying shit an awful lot but it's because it's one of the few words left that I can still say without paying for it.)

"I was laughing at myself being funny on drugs" Our first example of the funny results of shit happening. This phrase resulted from a memory of rolling through hospital in a new convertible Saturn Sky, ie. the hospital bed. It was prefaced by, "It wasn't the drugs, I was fine and I knew I was being funny." The moral of this is that you go to the ER feeling like you're dying, hours, dollars, lots of drugs and millions of XRAYS later, you're admitted and feeling good. Then you go to surgery, things get removed and you can laugh about in all the days to come.

We have all had those random nights where you go out and have a few drinks and then miraculously you're shit-faced. The next day your memories are fuzzy and you feel like crap. How did that happen? It wasn't intended, but it happened. This is because real friends don't cut friends off because if they did then there would be no black mailing for later and no funnies to tell. Okay, so that's the shit and these are some of the various results: Was he cute? I did what!? Indecent exposure (in both public and private places) Motorboats. Karaoke. Bouncing around on people. Sharpie tattoos. Drunk dialing. Booty calls. The occasional regurgitation. And the list goes on and on and on. Don't pretend like these things have never happened to you!!! If you do you are a liar!

Oh, and let us not forget about horrible first dates! Tom D, Liar Liar and Mr. Voyeurism are my top 3. Only 1/3 of these guys did we know was a no-go from the beginning, but that's what you get for not paying attention and not listening. Oh, but the fun memories that came from all of these poor guys! A fun drunk night with doctors with a hail storm immediately following (that should have been a sign), a real life experience with Big Fish, both being in Alabama, a coincidence, I think not, and then of course, the Cabbage Patch Factory and the things that were said over dinner...that one night at that place in Trussville.

Dot at the Beach. Shit 4 and this happens all of the time and it sucks! Silver lining is... if you're bloated then maybe you'll get a more even tan and when the bloating is gone, you'll be brown everywhere.

I would love to go on but then I would be late for work! I hope y'all enjoyed reading about some of the shit that has happened to me and my bitches, I'm sure that there will be more! Stay tuned for more fun times...

Summer Lovin’ Makes Me Glow

Originally written July 26, 2008

Of all the people I know, I am the least domesticated one of all. I would rather buy new clothes than to do laundry, I eat out a lot because cooking is not quite my forte, and all my life I've had a cleaning lady, the only exception would be when I was in college.

Every now and again though, I'll get a wild hair and decide to have a dinner party. This only happens about once a year and sometimes only every other year. So I decided on Thursday that I would have a party on Friday. It just so happened that Friday was July 25 and I had a theme: Christmas in July! It was very last minute but everything turned out great. Most of my nearest and dearest were able to attend and the festivities began around 6. My last guest just left and I'm left wondering why I don't do this more often. I cooked Christmas dinner all day and then enjoyed good company all night and we even played dirty Santa. I have holiday traditions that I've practiced for years. Today/yesterday was my very first time to celebrate Christmas in July. We did almost everything like real Christmas except for going out afterwards (something I've done every year since I was in high school!) but it wasn't necessary because most of my friends attended my party.

Sometimes, it's nice just to be able to stay home. I go out frequently and sometimes I feel like the bar is my home (does that mean I have a problem? lol) I guess it's just the change in atmosphere and the change in my age that makes me appreciate nights like tonight a little more every time one of them happens. I always feel more insightful and closer to my friends and family after my domestic modes, or maybe it was just the holiday theme. The holidays always make me feel a little warm and fuzzy (not that I need to be warm, it's so hot outside already!!) but there's just something about them that I love. The memories of holidays past resurface and linger and I can't help but think how much has changed yet how much is still the same. I also think that you can elaborate much more and say and do many things at home that you wouldn't actually say or do in a public place. For example: playing with handcuffs, showing off your new derrière, saying quoted comments like Hill called and said, "I was horny and came by to see your big titties; you said you would be at the pool but you lied" There's just a whole different level of honesty and crassness when you're in your own home. I think the alcohol may have also contributed to several of the conversations.

Summertime, you gotta love it! Summer has come and almost gone so fast. It seems as if gets shorter and shorter every year. Tonight we spoke of loves: new, old, stagnant and those hopefully to come and BJ and I decided that it's summer lovin' that make us glow. I've paid my domestic dues and now I can go back to my crazy self. Merry Christmas (in July) to all and to all a good night!

But occifer I didn’t mean to...

Originally written July 27, 2008

I am so surprised that I haven't been arrested lately! I've been doing stupid things- all by accident of course. I guess my mind is just wandering and I'm not paying attention. And all of my incidents have taken place while I was sober, so I really have no excuse! A couple of weeks ago while I was at the beach I stole a bracelet! I was just trying them on and went to a jewelry store to look at watches and there was a price tag hanging from my arm. I was so embarrassed! It must have gotten lost and mixed in with all of my previously paid for jingle jangles that I just happened to be wearing that day. After purchasing (paying and all!) a watch I ran back to the other store to return the bracelet. I didn't want the people to know that I had taken it by accident so I just put it back on the jewelry fixture and left. Hahaha so that was a funny thing that happened at the beach and then every store that I went into I felt like I should keep my hands in my pockets so that my newly discovered kleptoness would not take over. So then today, I tried to break into a car. It was not my car and I don't know who it belonged to. I was at the mall and I had parked in the parking deck. When I got ready to leave I saw a car that looked like mine and it was parked very close to where I actually parked. I hit the unlock button on my keys and the lights didn't come on. My immediate thought was that my key was broken because the other day I lost my keys and had to use a spare one and that clicker did not work. So I proceed to approach the car and stick my key in it and it will not turn. Then I look in the car and realize that it is not my car! I quickly remove my key and look around to see if anyone saw me do what I just did. Then I look up to see my car two spaces over- I know that this is my car because the lights are on and the doors are unlocked. I get in quickly and drive off knowing in the back of my mind that security somewhere is having a huge belly laugh at my stupidity. And then I hoped to myself that if that were so that they would also get a little choked on their coffee and donuts. I have now included thief and grand theft auto to my personal résumé so if you know any interested parties please let me know. Have their people call my people and we can set something up. lol

My Pool Boy Thinks I'm Hot

Originally written August 9, 2008

Wow! What a last couple of weeks! Last week was Tiff's birthday and we were all out for that and this week was A2's birthday! Tiff's not as big on birthdays as we are so our birthday adventures for her were a little more conservative and low key. I've just been lushy for the last two weeks and I think that it's catching up to me. I'm not a home-body by any means but my poor liver needs a break!

So here's a recap of just this week! There was Barbie, pot smokers, open containers, doctors, cockroaches, boobs, Harper sandwiches, and douche bags combined with a bitch named Dot and lots and lots of alcohol! The only way to describe this week is STICKERBUSH!

It all started on Wednesday. This was a not so good day for the birthday girl so while she was picking up some stuff for me at my house I told her that there was beer in the fridge and to take what she wanted. Whatever it takes to make it through the day is our motto and obviously she thought that beer would help. So she meets me at the mall and walks in drinking her beer. She can because it's her birthday and because she doesn't know that it's illegal. Someone explains to her the law and about 'open container' and she retorts her argument about a bar being a public place and you can drink there. When faced with liquor laws and licensing she says "Well, Ruby Tuesdays has a license and they're in the mall so it's okay! And it's my birthday!" The whole time still drinking her beer. And that's why I love her! We all met at Daves (minus 1) and had drinky drinks, birthday cake and cheese biscuits from Red Lobster. Birthdays are a big deal to us and the cake is very important. The last couple of cakes have not really been the best; they've been poorly decorated and not to Angela Standard. A2's cake was the best looking of them so far however, it wasn't really decorated. Dairy Queen's idea of decorating a cake is to put a paper plate on top top and ice around it. I didn't find this as amusing as some may have but it was okay because she loved it and it was Barbie and she got exactly what she had wanted. Okay, back to Daves. So, girls meet boys. Boys seem normal. Boys get drunk and lose social skills and tact. Boy asks girls if they smoke pot and then ask to go for a walk. Are you kidding me!? Boy is a man that should have grown out of that stage in his life by now. Period. After Daves we headed to Jacksons for dinner and there we saw Dr. Josh! Certain people miss out on things when they don't do what is expected of them. But, one day they'll learn and just suck it up, re-adjust, prioritize and move on-and by that I mean do what we want you to do ..

Moving on to Thursday, the actual birthday day! Yay! Afterwork we met up and went to Bo and Jonathan's to get ready and then headed to the Kudu. We drank a lot and then went home. I'm pretty sure that I was still drunk when I went to work at 9 the next morning. Which brings us to Friday. Jonathan had dinner reservations and we were all going to meet them after dinner for another night of birthday festivities. At dinner Angela got a special surprise, a cockroach decided to come out and say happy birthday to her. She was not very pleased with this nor was she excited about its presence. After their dinner we all met at the Kudu again. After lots of shots and beer things snowballed downhill. There was bra unhooking, boob showing, lots of picture taking and a Harper sandwich witnessed by an unknown person. And apparently I may have called someone a douche bag. Yikes.

This week was definitely a stickerbush week and hopefully a somewhat memorable birthday for my bffforever. And I say somewhat because I know that some memories have been lost and/or repressed! And for those of you who don't understand how the title fits the blog, just ask A2.

A Dating Adventure & 2 Very Important Questions

Originally written October 8, 2008

Tonight served as a learning experience and a test of my spiritual growth and maturity. After describing the events of my night to a dear friend (who has decided to live vicariously through me) she told me something very interesting and it made me think of one of my important questions. To make a long story short, she referred to my evening as charity and I asked her if because it was charity, could I use it to get a tax break?

The other question is something that I somewhat jokingly ask for and that is a gift receipt. Several years ago I was talking to someone about something, who knows what, I don't actually remember but it was probably about a guy or something that isn't really a gift but was none-the-less something that wasn't wanted and I said, "You should ask if that comes with a gift receipt."

The point of this is that there are two questions that can easily help you make a final decision about most things in life:
1. Does that come with a gift receipt?
2. Is it tax deductible?

Think about it. Big life changing questions:
Should I get married?
Should I have kids?
Should I buy real estate?
Should I buy a car, boat, plane, etc?

All of these things are tax friendly decisions, and you may be wondering, "What does any of that have to do with a gift receipt?" My theory about the gift receipt is sometimes you may get things you know you don't want or even things that you thought you wanted, but when it comes down to it, you really don't want it. So even though most of the answers to those questions is "No, it does not come with a gift receipt," it doesn't mean that you can't wish that they did.

Tonight was one of those 'ALL SALES ARE FINAL, NO REFUNDS OR EXCHANGES' kind of nights. It was something that I was doing to be nice but also something that I have been dreading. I knew that it was going to be nothing less than horrible and a waste of my time. (I'm going out of town this week and have to pack and run errands and go to the gym and really didn't want to waste my time having to go to dinner.) So can I take back an hour of my life? No, but I wish that I could, however it did not come with a gift receipt and though it could be considered charity I cannot write it off. So to do it over again, after asking myself these two questions, my answer would be different. It is now over and I can check it off of my list of things to do and hopefully not have to worry about any future endeavors of the same sort.

Wedding! PCB 2008! Bump it! Blow it up!

Originally written October 28, 2008

It all began with an engagement...Skip ahead to October 2008. So much to look forward to! One last beach trip for this year, a mini vacation, college friends, groomsmen and nuptials! My friend Michelle aka Smiley and her fiance Scott live in Panama City, Florida and decided to have their wedding ceremony on the beach. I was excited to be able to have an excuse to go back to the beach one last time before the year is over and also to be able to get away for a couple of days. The girls and I were looking forward to getting together and meeting up with old friends from college and hopefully making some new friends ;) ;) as well as being able to support our friend in her decision to wed and to be a part of "one of the happiest days of her life."
Tiffani went down on Wednesday and Rebecca and I drove down on Thursday. BA had class and didn't make it until Friday night. Shelley, Keith and Miranda also arrived Friday night. Our bridal itinerary began Friday afternoon with rehearsal followed by rehearsal dinner, panty party aka sock party but traditionally known as a lingerie party. (I say sock party because Smiley sleeps naked all except for her socks. The socks stay on for everything, and I mean everything! Just ask Tiffani! lol). Drinks were also to follow down at the tiki bar. Rebecca and I had our own plans for the day. We had planned to do some shopping because it was a bit overcast and we had to pick up some stuff for the panty party as well as some groceries and last but certainly least we had to get some beverages. :) Rebecca and I finished all of our tasks and began drinking around 2.
Rehearsal: Everything went very smooth and didn't take too long to get things figured out. This was also first sight of the groomsmen for me and Rebecca. Tiffani already knew the guys and she and Smiley were trying to give us the scoop on all of them. It was nice to be able to put a face with a story. They weren't so bad to look at and without the background information maybe they would have appeared more attractive. Yes, I am being judgmental but I have every right to be and I'm about to explain.
Groomsmen: There were six groomsmen including the best man. Two of them were married and the rest were single with at least a ton of baggage and additional issues. One of the four is in school to be and anesthesiologist but is currently a nurse, I think. He's short and I believe sexually deprived but the guys crack gay jokes on him. Another was dating his cousin who he had gotten pregnant but she miscarried (maybe that was a blessing in disguise, hello! incest GROSS!) Oh and that leaves the two R's. One became known as "tight pants" and the other as Auburn and/or Mama boy. Tight pants is self explanatory but his baggage was a cracked out ex-girlfriend and the other got his name for getting in an intense verbal confrontation with Rebecca about football and for going M.I.A. for a long time to talk to what he claimed to be his mother.

We attended the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner, drinks in hand the whole time.
After dinner we headed back to our condo where the panty party was going to be held. Keith, Shelley, Mer and BA had all arrived by this time. While we were doing the panty thing Keith got settled in and began making Jello shots. After the party we all (all of us and the majority of the bridal party and their significant others) met down at the tiki bar and drank and got acquainted and got to catch up with one another. After lots of drinks there were lots of laughs, tears and texts. We closed down the tiki bar and remained down by the pool until about 2 a.m. As we were heading in my phone rang. It was one of the two R's who had gotten my number because one tried to call the other from my phone. The call came after some texts that were also made from my phone inquiring about some things in exchange for some other things, however I did not send the texts and didn't realize until too late what was actually going on. In hindsight it's all very amusing but the point of all of this is that shortly after the phone call the two guys showed up at our door. Around 3 a.m. I decided that it would be best for me not to drink anymore, after all I had been drinking consistently for the last 13 hours. By this time we had also lost most of our peoples; some had gone to bed, some had passed out and others were doing who knows what with who. So we chatted with the guys for a bit and then things got heated. We hit the topic of sports and the shit started flying. Fighting words were said and doors were slamming but everything got resolved in the end and there were no visible hard feelings.

Living Out Loud: A Weekend with Keith Shoemaker

Keith Shoemaker. A trip and a half. Love him! So hilarious. He also concludes most everything with a knuckle bump and then blows it up...pssshhh! Keith and his wife Shelley and Mer all arrived Friday night. Although I had met Keith before I had never really gotten to hang out with him until this weekend. They all had a lot of catching up to do considering that we had all already been drinking since early afternoon. We all met down at the tiki bar and by this time the majority of the bridal party was already shmammered. The best man was passed out in a chair, one of the groomsmen decided to pull out his treasures and one of the bridesmaids was trying to pick fights with people because she thought they were "hating on her" another was trying to score some pot because life hadn't worked out the way she thought it would, and another was upset because of a disbelief in happily ever after and disappointment in society and its depreciated values of "I do." Keith did his best to keep things light by being himself. He instantly came up with names for people. He originated the names Drunk Ashley which later became Drunk Black Ashley and Tight Pants. We filled him in on the cousin situation and jokes were made about the family tree going straight up and not having conflict in where to go for holidays and how it helped minimize your gift giving. Oh! and I almost forgot, he also shared his theory and reasoning about the brown towel.

Saturday was a new day and "The Big Day" for Smiley. After only a couple of hours of sleep, our day started with another knock on the door. This time it was Keith and tray full of jello shots. How considerate of him to bring us breakfast. Yes, 9:54 a.m. and we are already doing jello shots. Prime example of 'hair of the dog.' The bride, her maids and her MOH were all getting ready in or condo so Rebecca, Keith, Shelly, Mer and I all went to soak up some sun. Mer and Shelley went down to the pool while we ate breakfast and packed a cooler. Rebecca and I decided to go down to the beach and set up camp. Shortly after the rest of the gang decided to join us and they were sporting their "Spring Break 2008, PCB, FL" gear. They had stopped on their way and gotten some discounted memorabilia-4 for $20 because it was so last season! =) The beach turned out to be not such a good idea! The wind was blowing incredibly hard and Keith named it Desert Storm 2008. After being completely exfoliated by the blowing sand we decided to go to the pool. Did I mention that this whole time we were still doing jello shots? Because we were. Keith's plan was to have the whole entire tray finished by 11 a.m. On the way to the pool Keith stopped to talk to strangers and offer them jello shots. I thought I was bad about talking to strangers but Keith is on a whole different level! I mean complete conversations, sharing food and drinks and inviting them to hang out! He doesn't just converse with them, he befriends them. So, after talking to these people, we realize that they are from Birmingham and were attending a wedding that had taken place the night before-right before Smiley and Scott's rehearsal. One of Tiff's ex's was attending that wedding and they had run into each other just briefly. Random! Anyways, after talking to those people for what seemed like for-ev-er!!! we finally made it up to the pool and with only eight jello shots remaining! We didn't make the 11 o'clock deadline and at this point we had totally lost track of time. Laying trashed by the pool, Keith decided to start offering jello shots to any and everyone that walked by. He was yelling, "Jello shots? Want a jello shot? They're really good! Just try one!" Then a little boy walked by and he said, "Hey little boy, want some jello?" Rebecca and I were bananas! Laughing so hard! It was so inappropriate and so funny all at the same time. Keith and I finished the remaining shots (everyone at the pool declined, surprised?) and we decided to go back up to the room to drop off the now empty cooler, refill beverages and order lunch.
Tiffani was about to get in the shower and BA was watching football when we came in. BA is a huge Alabama fan and football and Keith informed her that he doesn't like football but sometimes he watches it because his favorite part is the band. BA finally gives up on trying to convert this non-football lover and decided to start getting ready. Rebecca, Keith and I all decided that we wanted pizza from Mellow Mushroom. The problem was that Mellow Mushroom doesn't deliver and we couldn't/shouldn't drive to go and get it ourselves. Keith and his inebriated self began banging on Tiffani's bathroom door and yelling for her to let him inside. She got out of the shower, wrapped herself in a towel, cracked the door and peeped her head out. Keith then asked/begged her to go pick up pizza for us. Thank goodness she has a good sense of humor and a sense of grown up responsibility for all of us. She agreed and we called in our order. It was to be ready in 30 minutes. Tiffani, the MOH, was finished bathing and fixing her hair at this point. The 30 minutes had passed and Keith was anxious for her to leave and go pick up our food. With only half of her hair dry and looking all crazy she went to pick up the pizzas. When she arrived they hadn't even made them up. The girl at the register said, "Those are your pizzas there" while pointing in the kitchen to a man tossing dough. So she had to sit and wait for the pizzas to be made and cooked with people staring at her and her ridiculous hair and thrown together outfit.
When Tiffani left to go get our food, we headed back to the pool. On our way back down there was a lady in the elevator with us and Keith randomly burst out into song. It was funny, embarrassing and totally inappropriate. The song of choice was "My neck, my back..." in the elevator with a complete stranger and yes! he did finish the lyrics and then concluded by announcing that it was the theme song for the weekend. The woman had no choice but to laugh and run for the doors as soon as they opened. When Tiff finally got back everyone but me went up to eat. I like my pizza cold so I decided to stay at the pool. I ended up falling asleep and waking up only because my phone was ringing. After a conversation that I can only partially remember I decided that I should eat some real food and start getting ready for the wedding that was starting promptly at 5:30.
As usual, I was running late. Rebecca and I made in time for the unity ceremony and the vows but missed the beginning, oops. It was a gorgeous ceremony and I was just glad that I was able to walk there. FYI: Jello shots and margaritas all day long are not the best for coordination. After the actual ceremony there was a prayer ceremony on the beach and pictures to follow. Rebecca, Tiff, BA and I decided to have our own mini photo shoot on the beach too. Then we headed to the reception. During the reception two of the groomsmen, the two R's aka Tight Pants and Mama's Boy hooked up with some girls and left to seal the deal. Keith decided that he was going to go and get the last tray of Jello shots and bring them down because the open bar did not have jello shots. Why? We just don't know. After some jello dessert cups and several beverages the party got started and the infamous Dancing Queen was performed!!!!
After the reception we all met at the tiki bar. The prodigal groomsmen returned and the plan was to head to Spin. One of the groomsmen got busted talking about how it would only take him about 45 minutes to take his hook-up home and meet everyone at the club. The other and his hook up were planning to go to different clubs so that worked out well for both of them. The guy who is dating his cousin had gotten in a tiff at the reception because of a phone call from some other guy, probably her brother heehee, so he was ready to hit the club too. Rebecca, Tiffani and I were exhausted so we didn't go with the rest. Shelly and Mer went to bed too.
The next morning was filled with laughter and stories that had happened the night before. Keith, BA, Drunk Black Ashley and Camille didn't get home until 4 or 5 in the morning. They went to Spin, another bar and Waffle House. Some major events were that Tight Pants tried to cut a corner on his bike and got stuck in the sand and flipped his bike but couldn't get off because his pants were too tight. Keith and Drunk Ashley danced with some interesting people and got sandwiched between them, borrowed their hats and then got harassed by them the rest of the night. One of the Rs' crazy ex girlfriends was at the club as he was leaving to hook up with someone else. (Just for clarification, it was not the same girl he hooked up with from the wedding- he had already had her twice and left her on the couch to go to the club. This was someone new.) And at the Waffle House there was conversation of blowing mud, The Golden Girls, Designing Women- Black Man! Black Man! and The Night that the Lights went out in Georgia along with an autographed Waffle House hat.
I am LMAO just at the memories that I recall! I hate that missed out but there was only so much that I could handle. It was real! Bump it...Pssshhh! And then we all headed home.